March 15, 2005
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Grabbing the Bull by the ….
Last week my CEO and I hosted several visitors from the local business community for a briefing on our firm. All together we were a group of five: two women, three men. Most of us were dressed in some form of unobtrusive business casual. The other woman wore a dazzlingly patterned miniskirt over stalwart thighs, and as she spoke energetically about collaborative relationships, her long black curls swirled, filling the air with the scent of green apple. In contrast to the rest of us in our drab trousers and short locks, she was very much the bird of paradise.
Working his way through our standard corporate introduction, my boss started describing potential clients for our line of cryocoolers (machines that cool to liquid-gas temperature). Did we deal with any other Ohio firms? Asked one of the men. “Yes,” explained my boss, “we’ve had inquiries from Select Sires, a firm that markets…uh..." and, uncharacteristically, he paused as he sorted through the most appropriate choice of descriptors.
“Semen!” cried the other woman enthusiastically. Grinning broadly and without the slightest sign of hesitation or embarrassment, she went on, “I grew up on a dairy farm, and we knew those folks really well. They used to put out calendars with one of their bulls for each month. Now those bulls were really ….. well!” she laughed merrily.
The guys all looked studiously at the walls. After a moment the senior man, a Vice President used to addressing large halls of rapt audience members, cleared his throat. “Would this machine,” he asked tentatively “be useful for vaccine cooling?”
“Yes!” cried my boss, and the other men leapt happily after him into safer conversational waters.
I related this tale to my thoughtful friend-and-colleague, who pointed out: You women hold all of the cards in these situations. Men have to wait to see what's going to be acceptable, even the guys who imagine themselves always in control.
Which is an excellent point, and renders the tale less like a joke and more like reverse gender discrimination (I can only imagine the 'male' version of the scenario in which a well-turned-out guy ends up extolling the virtues of his brand of silicon for breast enhancement, or some such).
Still. I did laugh.
Comments (19)
Because it's FUNNY. But actually, I just think men basically aren't as comfortable discussing such things. I find that my discussions with other women are almost always way bawdier than any conversations with men, or even men by themselves. I saw on one of those 20/20 type shows once the difference between women in a male strip club and men in a female dancer's club. It was amazing. The women were crazy-loud, and the men were all quiet. It was by hidden camera, so no one knew they were being taped. Interesting. Also, I think even when men venture there in discussion, it's a lot more general. Men will say, "man, I tapped that ass last night," and women will tell you EXACTLY what they did that drove the guy crazy.
The mini-skirt sure didn't help. Others might have found the situation uh...chilling.
I don't have a comment specifically on this post, but on all your posts in general. I have been reading you for a couple of weeks, and I always find your writings insightful and well-written...and often very amusing too! It's a gift to be able to see things in a humorous way, and yet not lose sight of a deeper meaning. I enjoy the way you observe things in your world and the way you share them with us readers. Keep writing, you are very good!
I like that woman. People (men and women alike) are too afraid to take the bull by the... horns.
**wink!** LoL!! We need more birds of paradise among us.
she was....well.....ballsy! lol
i like this story. it made me laugh and it made me think.
btw, whenever i go to the US i need to be constantly checking my language and my jokes, especially in front of clients and distant co-workers. i would have not have been embarassed descibing the bull or the balls, but i would have thought twice if that would be grounds for sexual harassment.
i really do hate it when people get too PC. it's the birds of paradises that make meetings happy.
It's the birds of paradise who make life more interesting, that's for sure. Overall, I think a lot of people are uncomfortable using "those kind" of words. Im not usually bothered by that sort of thing. Except:Last week we had an older gentleman come in to have the wax cleaned out of his ears. I was uncomfortable when I had to ask him if he had ever had VD, HIV, or did he have difficulties getting an erection. He answered, quite loudly, no, no, What's that? Thank goodness he had a sense of humor about it. Blessings abound
i don't think it's acceptable in society for men to talk about that stuff openly and freely...not that we're eager to do it, i think our programming goes deeper than that...think about it...who does most of the care taking? our dear sweet moms, who probably make sure their sons don't say inappropriate things, yet gab with their own girlfriends in XXX detail ;P
funny story. that is true. about women setting the pace for pc behaviour. at least in alot of offices i have worked in.
Thanks for the comments. Although, in order to experience critique, I have to generate something to be critiqued. I don't need a method for writing the "perfect" story, but a method (or a few) for generating any story at all. As often as I keep giving up, figuring I must not be a "born writer," I keep coming back and trying again. Or desiring again. I am "born wannabe," if nothing else. I just keep riding the waves, away from story and back again.
funny... don't know what to say... being in a very conservative office, wearing hot pink or a cute hat has raised quite a ruckus... sometimes beige is beautiful, and keeps the waters safe and serene. However, I will not give up my Pucci-patterned flowy blouse, and I'll continue putting neck scarves around my waist as a belt (helps define the fact I DO have a waist somewhere down there...). Saying that, I'm unsure if I would pipe up with 'Semen' in a meeting... unless we're talking about some sailors (heh, couldn't resist). Oh well... kisses, thanks for giving me a good story...
I wanted to read this blog but had trouble concentrating past the phrase "dazzlingly patterned miniskirt." OK, then I did manage to continue reading and as funny as it all might be, I can't help thinking the serious thought of that woman knowing EXACTLY what she was doing. I bet she thought the get-together was funny before, during, and afterward, as she gigglingly conceived of her plot, executed it, and savored the aftermath.
I'm laughing too. It's funny.
Great story. It's really an interesting comment on human behavior, isn't it?
hahahaha That is funny. If she'd gone on to talk about how well hung the bulls were, you could have amused yourself with counting how many shades of red the gents would have turned. I've seen this dynamic before and I think you're right. A well heeled professional woman generally does hold the cards in the company of men, no matter how self-assured the latter believes itself to be.
That is hilarious. The funniest thing is how the men reacted. I'd have had a hard time maintianing my composure during that conversation.
have a great weekeend
this is a chilling commentary on the state of our culture and our society today... and a great illustration of its schizophrenic nature.
oh my. being a farm girl of sorts....I am intimately familiar with the bovine anatomy.
not very shy about human anatomy either (this is where my biological degree comes in very handy...I know the actual term for it).
that's a good one.
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